Drapes
Mother of God, and wrenching inked palaces seven hundred paces into the forest.
Holy nearing the bridges and creaking bricks to nearing their final edge.
Torment the place with everything the night can possibly possess
Hunting and waiting
Hollow and etched, gasping bare windows
Cold metal stirring with the deserted air;
Armor banded to old walls.
Carry out and deplore yourselves, for the clock will definitely soon strike twelve.
I told you now,
and I have told you then,
and you will be told
that there is nothing to be done.
Now the place dips and shivers
Like a bad feeling,
As one’s heart drops.
The whole palace whines through wind bitten windows,
And the drapes whip and thrash and flail and cling for dear life.
Silver satin held by deep-browned brass.
You can never pale its song,
Slamming the walls and tattering the ceiling with its gigantic wings
Its silky sheen glares;
It’s angry
It’s hurt
It’s confused
It’s helpless
It’s trying
It’s pleading
It’s holding
And gripping.
And no one knows where the wind blows from—Outside or in?
Hungry for the view it gives, and forever tied up to cover it.
Wow, this is definitely my favorite poem you have submitted so far. It's quite striking, and the language is fresh and exciting nearly all the way through, though in general, I think you are at your best in this poem when your lines are longer and you give yourself room to improvise.
ReplyDeleteWhat I like is how until the final stanza nearly every line tried to do something interesting. I find little things to admire all through the poem, even though I only have a vague sense of what the speaker in the poem is trying to articulate.
There were times when I wondered if the words chosen were always intentional, as in this line: "Carry out and deplore yourselves" Deplore means to feel or express strong disapproval of something. I can't figure out why the voice in the poem would advise readers to express or feel strong disapproval of themselves. Is it possible another word was intended?
Anyway, we should probably discuss this one in class soon, so I will save my comments for later.
These are some intense drapes!